Here is a resiliency strengthening perspective on the experience of being rejected.
Th
ere is a theory that humans fear two main conditions—to be invaded physically, sexually and emotionally or to be abandoned physically and emotionally. So it may be hard to believe we could ever be happily rejected. right? My invitation is to keep your awareness open to the opportunity. It feels great!
One evening the phone rang and a young woman’s voice said, “May we have 10 minutes of your time for a mental health survey?”
Patricia: Why, of course.
Young Woman: Answer “not at all,” “sometimes” or “often” to the following questions: How often to you feel hopeless about your future?
Patricia: Absolutely not at all! I have so much I appreciate, plus I plan to visit my Mom in November, write another book, travel and create some super duper presentations for 2005. And did I tell you I am ready for a new trendy hairdo?
Young Woman: How often do you think you are not as good as other people?
Patricia: Not at all, although I suppose I might if the Queen came for tea. I used to feel less intelligent than my sweetie, Les. Then one day our young daughter said, “Maybe Daddy knows lots but Mommy is really, really good at making things up.” I’ve embraced the idea that we all have unique intelligence, strength and gifts.
Young Woman: How often do you think that everything is an effort?
Patricia: Not at all since I started doing more of what I love to do. And, I don’t even feel guilty that my housework NOT TO DO list is longer than my TO DO list.
Young Woman: How often has the pleasure and joy gone out of your life?
Patricia: Not at all; if anything it has increased. I expect there are moments I naturally feel sad, scared or mad but I know those feelings will pass if I attend to them with pleasures and joys waiting around the corner.
Young Woman: Thank you m’am.
Patricia: Wait! That wasn’t 10 minutes and anyway, I’m enjoying talking to you.
Young Woman: I’m sorry, m’am, but I have to reject you because you don’t qualify for our survey. You are much too happy!
When have you been happily rejected?
