Martin Seligman, the founder of Positive Psychology, studied how pessimists tend to internalize responsibility when circumstances are negative. They tend to think they are worthless, talentless, and unlovable. They say things like, “I’m stupid. It’s all my fault.” They tend to blame others or circumstances outside themselves thinking, “They are so stupid; they don’t know a good thing when they see it.” In contrast, the danger of extreme optimism is the tendency to avoid responsibility for one’s part in an unsuccessful event. However, pessimists’ tendency to regularly and inappropriately accept responsibility is a sure formula for depression.
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ased on positive psychology findings, there are a number of advantages to developing an optimistic perspective. Since it supports depression, pessimism is associated with a weak immune system. Pessimism feels down—blue, sad, worried or anxious. Optimism and pessimism can become self-fulfilling prophecies. Because pessimists tend not to create or face challenges, they fail more frequently—even when success is possible. Seligman says, “The best thing one can say about a pessimist is that his fears were founded.”
Alternatively, optimism encourages happiness and, therefore, is associated with vitality. Optimism feels up—hopeful, confident and cheerful. I say, “The best thing one can say about an optimist is that she enjoyed the challenge regardless of the outcome.”
Optimism needs restraint when the cost of failure of a choice is clearly too high. Then we need to slow down and look at reality. It may have been an optimist who invented the automobile and a pessimist who created the brakes and the air bag. However, it was Dr. Phillip McGraw who said, “Eighty percent of our decisions are based on fear.” If that’s true, we live in a pessimistic culture that could use some optimistic balancing. Here are some optimistic how to’s:
- Realize your beliefs are just that—beliefs. They may or may not be factual.
- Ask if your beliefs are useful and supportive to your work and life.
- Argue with yourself. Say, “Stop!” to pessimistic self-talk and replace with some optimistic thinking. “I know enough. I do enough.”
- Ask, “What’s the worst that could happen? Do I have a strategy to deal with that outcome?” If not, create one.
- Do something for those less fortunate.
- Develop your optimism muscle by seeing the bright side. Change Bad News into Good News. “I don’t like the extra weight on my hips but now there is more of me to love.”
- Count your blessings.
Optimists and pessimists have been around since Noah. Was he a pessimist to believe the flood was coming or was he an optimist to believe his idea of an ark would help all those critters? Optimists are definitely known for their action and hope.
