Archives for January 2013
The headlines are filled with cycling champion, Lance Armstrong’s cheating. In his first interview with Oprah Winfrey (televised January 17, 2013) he said, “I went and looked up the definition of cheat . . . the definition is to gain an advantage on a rival or foe. I did not view it that way. I viewed it as a level playing field.” Regardless of his definition and how he viewed it,he cheated. He lied. He violated the trust of millions who supported his charity, LiveStrong Foundation. Many of them feel hurt, betrayed and disgusted and are throwing daggers and threats Armstrong’s way. He has been globally judged and shamed as A Liar. I have been with people suicidal for far smaller deceptions.
Most of us have had our personal boundaries violated. I have been asked in a job interview how much my money my husband makes. The obvious answer was “None of your business.” Then there was the manager who patted my behind. Boundaries in relationships help all parties feel emotionally and physically safe. When we establish clear boundaries, we make it easier to know when to say no, yes or remain open and flexible. Boundaries help us be in integrity and align with our values. Typical workplace values include competition, diversity, discipline, ethics and excellence. Typical family values include care, commitment, faith, feelings and home. As a leader, at work or home, when you maintain behavior appropriate rules (policies) and guidelines, you build trust, safety and a sense of belonging.