Just as water is home to fish, our conversations are the context or home to our relationships. Sharing and listening are keys to making relationships work. Good communication that creates mutual understanding is even better. Effectively Speak Let us begin with speaking with honesty, kindness, authenticity, and sometimes assertiveness. You have control over the words you choose. […]
One of the most effective ways to create a healthy mindset is to weed whack your negative self-talk. You know, that head chatter that probably led to a nasty core belief or two. Tackling basic beliefs about ourselves is a daunting task but well worth the effort. Here is a piece of my story. One day while […]
She bent down and tied up her 9-year-old’s shoe strings. Remarkably, the little guy is a bright, and potentially capable, boy. Millennials (those born between the mid-1990s to early 2000s) are often times called The Me Me Me Generation. They tend to be over-protected from challenge, consequences, and tears. As the family researcher, Jean Illsley […]
While happiness is a desirable emotional state, compassion and empathy are developed through opportunities to feel disappointment, sorrow and pain. Parents weaken their children’s resilience when they protect them from experiencing the uncomfortable consequences of life’s hard bits. Consequently, I invited parents to resign from believing or attempting to make happy children. I am not […]
Every now and then our relationships could benefit from an examination. Of course, it begins with ourselves. We can check our generosity, honesty, kindness, compassion, appreciation, empathy, and love. As was written in the bible, “The greatest of these is love.” Gary Chapman, the family therapist and author of The Five Love Languages, provides a key […]
American reporter and humorist, Franklin P. Jones (1908-1980), wrote, “Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance or a stranger.” Like Jones, you may dislike receiving criticism. Logically then, we should also be cautious about giving criticism. I was once given twenty-seven criticisms in the guise of feedback. It […]
Have you ever wondered about your humor personality or telling a joke or two? WAIT! You might be asking, “Do I need to tell jokes to have a sense of humor?” Absolutely not! Read on! Most of us, at some time or another, crack a smile — if not a gut wrenching guffaw. Having a sense of […]
Years ago, my heart was deeply moved as Les and I shared dinner and personal stories with our dear friends, Judy and Tink. Judy Armstrong, a multi-talented artist who excelled in acting, singing, songwriting, and dancing, had once fallen head over heels for Tink, a versatile artist himself, skilled in acting, singing, dancing, and choreography. […]
If you dread job searching, you are not alone. A young woman, let us call her Jane, emailed me with a request to help her. The majority of her message about looking for a job is below: Good Morning, I have always enjoyed your e-newsletters and your positive messages for resiliency. I am also a […]
Research indicates humor can help increase creativity, cut stress, improve relationships, and attract clients. Yet, there are misconceptions about lightening up in the work environment.
She looked baffled as I asked her about her reaction to a disturbing event. 1. “How do you feel?” “I don’t know.” 2. “What sensations do you feel in your body?” “I don’t know.” 3. “What are you telling yourself?” “I don’t know.” This young woman’s Emotional Intelligence (EQ) was low. Years ago that young […]
Workplaces with sound leadership can significantly help strengthen personal and emotional resilience. Resilience in the workplace typically happens when management’s behavior and attitude is supportive, fair and adaptive to employee needs. Years ago I counseled Rachel, who was repeatedly criticized by her manager. She was told she was either too verbal at meetings or not […]