“Shame on you!” hits differently than “You are guilty of taking the cookie from the cookie jar.” While they might sound similar, shame and guilt are actually very different emotional experiences—and both can deeply affect our well-being. Add in resentment, especially when it’s directed at those who trigger these feelings, and it becomes even more […]
When I interviewed women for the book, From Woe to WOW: How Resilient Women Succeed at Work, a store cashier told me this story. She cried in her basement suite for a month after she was “accused of stealing when she did not even have training on how to manage the cash register.” She […]
Book Summary of Fault Lines: Fractured Families and How to Mend Them In the last several years, clients have increasingly expressed sadness and grief about experiences of family cut offs or estrangement. Dr. Karl Pillemer, author of Fault Lines refers to this dynamic as fractures. Here is a summary of his book, including the research, […]
Relationship cut-offs are painful. They can trigger feelings of hurt, helplessness, hopelessness, and rejection. But here is help to repair a relationship.
In-law challenges are high on the list of distress to coupleships. It’s hard to have a resilient and intimate partnership if you have to deal with a resentful or interviewing in-law, often the notorious mother-in-law. Regrettably women seem more frequently to have mother-in-laws who are interfering and inordinately critical.
Taking an assertive stance seldom fails. To avoid speaking passively or an aggressively discover basic assertiveness training skills.
The probability of arguing or disagreeing in a love relationship. Some describe these moments as Relationship Fighting.
You and your dear one are discussing what to prepare for dinner. Suddenly your heart races and your fists clench. You are ready to fight, run or collapse. Your dearest is now the enemy! YIKES! You are now in the depth of an emotional trigger! Most of have been there! Repeatedly, when people ask, “What […]
Conversation can take a nasty turn of misunderstanding.
Too often one adult declares that another adult is being abusive. Before you decide you are in a bullying or abusive relationship and call the Abuse Police, get a handle on what is really happening. OK? Abuse is mistreatment, by any other person or persons, that violates a person’s human and civil rights. Children […]
Drama Triangle–The model describes three unconscious and habitual behavioral habits as “roles” which people often play in relationships.
The Empowerment Triangle: There are three healthy alternatives to playing victim, persecutor or rescuer from the Drama Triangle. They are the creator, the challenger and the coach.